Things I have been researching

I have been reading a ton of blogs posted by other people who have endured or are enduring the same thing as I am. I am getting worried because it seems like healing time is going to be a year or so. I just never thought that this would happen to me. I feel like my life is going to have to change and that I won't be able to be as outgoing as I used to be.

I have been noticing that as the numbness in my ankle is going away, I have a little more pain and tingling in my ankle and foot. I hope this is part of the healing process.

I found some products online that promote faster healing. I ordered them. I'm anxious to give them a try. Here's the link to the website:

http://shop.aidmyankle.com/index.php?osCsid=cjok4ttbv3pe34cqjoh3h8g7v7

The first 3 items are for the ankle. It seems like a lot of the pain has to do with blood flow to the ankle.

I really want to be the person I was and enjoy the things I truly enjoy that unfortunately involve a lot of ankle movement. I want to do everything in my power, the doctor's power and God's power to get back to normal. Unfortunately, my summer is shot, but there's always next year right.

Well, as soon as I get the products and am able to use them, I will let you know what I think and what I experience while using them. There is a 60 day money back guarantee so that's enough time to try their products out and feel a difference.

Wish me luck!!

Is it normal to feel this way???

I have always looked at the glass as half full. I usually see the positive in things and don't really focus on the negative. I wish I could continue to be that way. I have been depressed over my broken ankle. I am depressed that I can't drive. I'm depressed that I am at other people's mercy's. I'm depressed that my freedom has been taken from me. I'm depressed that I can't work. I'm depressed that I can't dance or walk or do simple things.

Everything is a struggle right now. When you use crutches, you can't carry things in your hands. For example, you can't carry a beverage and walk. You can't carry food in your hands and walk. Everytime I cook, I have to carry the plate 1 foot, put it down, crutch myself over 1 foot, pick up the plate, move it another foot, put it down, crutch myself over 1 foot, over and over again until I get the plate where I want it to be. Same thing with a beverage. Nothing is simple right now.

Yesterday was my 1 month anniversary since I broke my ankle and fibula. The few times I have gotten to get out of the house, I make people take my wheel chair because I am not comfortable walking on the crutches. I have this constant fear that I'm going to fall forward while walking on them and the last thing I want it to hurt another part of my body. I hate having to get up on curbs to go into a store or a restaurant. Those 4"seem sooooo high and some curbs are 6"tall. My family and friends try to help me, but that freaks me out even more. I have to make sure I have the crutches firmly on the ground, lift my broken leg high enough, and then make sure I jump high enough with my good leg.

I keep reading other people's blogs who say that their ankle will never be the same. That scares me to death. I have always had loose ankles. I love to dance!! Expecially Salsa, ballroom, hip hop. I have some really cool foot moves that I like to do. I also love Zumba and am very coordinated in those classes. I fear that I will not be loose like I used to be and that my passion for dancing and Zumba are out the window. I was even considering being a Zumba instructor. That's how much I love that class.

I also wear high heals everyday. It's rare for me to wear low shoes or tennis shoes. And other bloggers have stated that it has taken them over a year to begin wearing heals again and that their ankle doesn't feel stable when they do. Is this break going to take away everything I love??

I am also worried about the muscle deterioration. I keep doing leg lifts with my broken leg and leg extensions, hoping I can minimize the deterioration. I am also constantly moving my toes and my foot withing the constraints of the cast to try to promote some flexibility.

My cast comes off on June 22, 2010. I am hoping to be promoted into a walking cast. Yet, the walking casts I see online seem to be a regular cast with a boot attachted to them. I sure hope that's not what I'm going to get. I am really hoping for a removable cast so that I can take a bath and begin to feel somewhat normal. I keep looking online to see how long people are typically in a walking cast, but can't seem to get any straight answers. So, I can only assume it varies case by case.